Hazel Tells Laverne
Katharyn Howd Machan
Hazel is a cleaning lady who is telling Laverne about a pleasant surprise she encountered while cleaning a bathroom. She relives the fairy tale of the Princess and the Frog when a frog appears in the toilet bowl. The frog goes through the routine of kiss him on the nose and you become a princess. That's when Hazel "screams ya little green pervert an [she] hitsm with [her] mop" (Machan). This turns the fairy tale on its head, and actually is more believable. A talking frog who demands kisses is quite terrifying, and few people would actually be tempted by the promise of a princess. Another quality of the poem is her diction. The simple, poorly constructed sentences provide a comfortable setting for the conversation. The poem feels like Hazel is talking to me about her crazy day (and boy does Hazel have some hilarious stories). She concludes the story re-questioning herself as a princess, as if the frog was totally ridiculous for offering her princesship (which is now a word).
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